We know that some shy children can blossom into social beings, while others remain socially inept or handicapped, more likely to bully or be bullied. The psychologist, school counsellor or a caring teacher can see a child for only a few hours each week. But you, as the parent, have far more time to coach your child and build his social and emotional resilience. You provide the early social learning environment for your children. This is later adapted and modified by other social experiences at school and elsewhere.
One day someone enterprising will create a social survival skills programme which can be directly installed into a child's brain. Meanwhile, help your child trash his negative beliefs and replace them with respectful, assertive, self-protective behaviours. All the skills in this book are practised every day, everywhere, by confident, popular children. If you don't believe me, then just check with your child how the sociable, popular kids would react in a similar situation.
Here are a few coaching tips:
• Apply flexibility to use the appropriate techniques in this book.
• Use assertive behaviours instead of passive or aggressive ones.
• Coach your children about the qualities required for true, caring friendships and assist them to create and maintain these friendships.
• Take an active role in encouraging social activities.
Now let's look at the key factors in social coaching.
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