Extension

Copyright 2003 by the Board of Regents of the University of Wisconsin System doing business as the division of Cooperative Extension of the University of Wisconsin-Extension. Send inquiries about copyright permission to Manager, Cooperative Extension Publishing, 103 Extension Bldg.,432 N. Lake St.,Madison,WI 53706. Produced by Cooperative Extension Publishing. University of Wisconsin-Extension, Cooperative Extension, in cooperation with the U.S. Department of Agriculture and Wisconsin counties,...

Relationship pathways

Relationships often develop along common pathways.The paths illustrated here show only some of the possibilities that children may experience.5 They are based on the quality of care the child is given and whether the child's situation changes frequently or stays fairly stable.You may find that one or more of the pathways are recognizable, based on your grandchild's experiences. Relationship pathways for children who initially have a secure attachment Each relationship is different.The...

What is attachment

Attachments are relationships that children form with the most special and trustworthy people in their lives. Although these relationships usually begin between infants and their parents at birth, attachments can form when children are older, too.The most common attachment is between mother and baby. However, the child could form an attachment with any person (including grandparents, aunts and uncles, older sibling, or babysitter) if the right type of care is given. By the time babies are 18...

The relationship between you and your grandchild

The new relationship between you and your grandchild can be difficult. You are not the parent,and you may not feel like a grandparent either. Both you and your grandchild may have to make an effort to understand new and different roles and rules for your relationship.The relationship each of you has with the child's parents may complicate the situation, and may require a lot of work and patience. In some cases, the situation may cause you to think about the relationships you had with your own...

Patterns across generations

Some family characteristics are likely to be passed on from one generation to the next.The reasons may be due to genetics, similar ways of living, parenting styles, modeling of behaviors and coping strategies, or a combination of these and other factors.The good news is that positive, secure attachment relationships are often passed on to more than one generation. (For a description of attachment relationships, see fact sheets 2 and 3.) The bad news is that negative relationships and problems...

Culture and parenting strategies

Children's behaviors are guided by culture. Good behavior in one culture may be considered bad behavior in another culture.Ways of parenting and disciplining children vary in different cultures.What is good parenting in one culture may be poor parenting in another culture. In the United States, for example, many families value independence and a strong will.These characteristics are seen in children who help make decisions and express their feelings to others. In many Eastern countries,...

The importance of close relationships

How long do most grandparents spend raising grandchildren According to the 2000 U.S. Census, close to 40 of grandparents raising grandchildren have been doing so for five or more years. Whether your grandchildren have been with you for a long or short time, you can have a strong influence on how they relate to others. Children's relationships with parents and grandparents are very important to healthy development. Positive relationships are an important part of every child's development.This...

Characteristics of positive attachment figures

Most children have a few attachment figures in their lives. An attachment figure typically cares for the child physically and emotionally, is someone the child can count on, and has an emotional attachment to the child.2 Most grandparents raising grandchildren meet these standards. People who have a positive attachment relationship with a child share the following characteristics

Grandparents thoughts and feelings about close relationships

Having a good relationship with your grandchild is very important for the child's development. Many things go into making a good relationship. Of them, researchers have identified two critical factors (1) how sensitively and responsively the child is treated and (2) the adult's state of mind about close relationships.2 State of mind refers to the way a person thinks and feels about relationships. A person with a positive state of mind talks about memories and feelings in a clear, organized,...

Culture and attachment

Different cultures have different ways of raising children. In some cultures only the mother cares for the child. In others, many people in the community help out. Researchers have looked at the role attachment plays in different cultures.They have found that attachment relationships are important in most, if not all, cultures. All children in all cultures look for safety and comfort from a person or people who can take care of their needs. However, the ways that children and adults show their...

Grandparents Raising Grandchildren The Cycle of Family PatternsI

There are many resources available to grandparents raising grandchildren but they're not always easy to find.The following list of books and web sites are resources that we feel provide helpful and accurate information on raising grandchildren. Grandparents as Parents A Survival Guide for Raising a Second Family. Sylvie De Toledo and Deborah Edler Brown. New York The Guilford Press, 1995. This book addresses several difficult issues that grandparents face when they take on a new, and often...

Breaking negative family cycles

Problems do not have to be passed from one generation to the next. Researchers looked at families where mothers either continued or broke away from family cycles of abuse. They found that abused mothers who did not abuse their own children had one or more of the following things going for them 1 They had a stable, supportive relationship with a husband or partner. They had participated in therapy. They had received emotional support from a non-abusive adult during childhood.

Reviewers

Human Development Department of Family and Consumer Sciences North Carolina State University Maryanne Haselow-Dulin Editing Services Program Director, Southern Child Welfare Training Partnership School of Human Ecology University of Wisconsin-Madison Janet Sainer, Special Consultant Relatives as Parents Program The Brookdale Foundation Second Time Around Mary Dobbs Family Resource Center Grandparents Parenting Again Waukesha Women's Center Grandparents Raising Grandchildren...

How were these sheets developed

Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

We developed these fact sheets to help grandparents raising their grand-children.We used grandparent experiences and research as guides. Grandparents raising grandchildren are the experts when it comes to their own situations We also talked to professionals in the area of child development and in the field of aging. And we talked to professionals who work with grandparents raising grandchildren in the community. Grandparents and professionals reviewed and commented on earlier drafts of these...