By Laura Sullivan

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How rough are we talkin ?

Don't stress. Vacationing at a farm or ranch doesn't mean you'!! be handed a bucket and a bar of soap at shower time. You'll find every range of accommodation on the roughing-it scale: At the most rustic, the wranglers jingle-jangle into the breakfast hall with you and you're expected to earn your keep with chores. (And your kids thought setting the table was an injustice barely survived.) At larger "resort ranches" and farm stays, you get a massage or play a round of golf while kids are corralled into the highly organized kids' program for hayrides, folk dancing, and animal-grooming lessons. What will most farms and ranches have in common? Lots of opportunities to enjoy the outdoors, hearty home-cooked meals included in the price, and the ability to chill at a slower pace for a while.

Should I choose a farm or a ranch? Six is the magic age at which kids are allowed to saddle up on a horse independently at most dude ranches (they're physically strong enough then and covered by the ranch's Insurance company), so think about farm visits when they're younger. However, there are always exceptions. Gregg and Laura Ross of Austin, TX, have been going to ranches since their 5-year-old was a toddler. "I think my daughter would rebel if we told her we were going somewhere else," says Gregg. "I remember the trips by what new thing she was able to do each year, from pony rides to bucket roping [lasso practice for little kids who can't lasso livestock] and, soon, horse rides on her own."

What makes these trips special?

Farm and ranch regulars say luxury doesn't always mean a fancy-schmancy dinner menu or a marble bathroom. Sure, that resort in the Caribbean was nice, but at a farm or a ranch, "it's different because of the relationship you form with the place and, especially, with the people," says Stephanie Wilson, president of the Colorado Dude and Guest Ranch Association. Ranchers and farmers are more or less inviting you into their homes, and that's just what it feels like. Melissa Bland, a mom of two in Missouri City, TX, says she was surprised when someone arrived at her door in the morning with coffee and a schedule of the day's activities; it was touches like that that made the trip special.

Is it expensive?

Rates vary by property, but as a general guideline, expect to pay as much as $350 per night for two adults and two children 3 and older at a farm; $700 at a large resort-type ranch. Those rates will include all your meals and activities. Kids under 3 are almost always free. Some ask that you stay for at least a weekend; others require a week. Aviva Goldfarb, a mom of two in Chevy Chase, MD, gets the most out of her weekend stays by flying in the day before and staying in a cheap motel nearby. She rouses the family early and heads straight for the ranch so they get a full day's activities in. And, she says, the ranch is always worth the price. "Ranches are great because everyone can find his happy place, then come together at the end of the day. It is truly a life experience that you can't put a price tag on," she says.

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