Ability to use energy creatively

He enjoyed his friends and family and, mostly, they enjoyed him. I say mostly because sometimes Matt could get really angry. If things didn't go quite his way, he could shout and scream at people. He would slam doors, push other kids around, or throw things that happened to be near him. His mom and dad had long said things like, You'd better learn to control that temper, young man, or one day you will get into real trouble. Now Matt was noticing that some of his...

Changing Patterns of Behavior

One of the main reasons that parents bring children to therapy is to modify troublesome behaviors, be they enuresis, stealing, lying, eating disorders, drug abuse, aggression, or withdrawal. Such conduct problems may affect relationships with parents, siblings, peers, or teachers and cause unhappiness not just for the child but for those in the near vicinity of the child. Helping a child or family change a pattern ofbehavior has long been a core, and well-researched, goal of psychotherapeutic...

Fundirected activities

What you just said reminded me of something Angela said, and you might be curious to know what it was. Angela was someone about the same age as you, and when I asked her what she would like to be doing more of, her words may not have been the same as yours but I think the meaning was. She answered, Having fun. I never did learn why Angela wasn't having as much fun as she wanted. In fact, it might have been that she was having some fun and wanted to have more. Maybe we didn't even need to talk...

Outcomes Offered

New skills for managing old fears Methods for reality testing Charlie had heard a story that he didn't know whether to believe. It was just that all the other trainees on the sailboat seemed to believe that the ship had its own ghost. Ghost stories are for kids, thought Charlie, not teenagers. For as long as Charlie could remember, he had enjoyed boats and the sea. He would look enviously at sailboats cruising by on the ocean. He looked at them in magazines, read books about sailing, and drew...

Learning from the Main Teachers

Usually, parents are the main teachers in a young child's life. In general, they are the ones who are there from birth, the ones who spend the most time with the child, and the ones who provide the role model for how to behave, interact, and respond to life's various situations. They communicate stories, in words and behaviors, that will teach the child about values, problem-solving, relationships, and other necessary life skills whether helpful or not. I have long considered the most important...

Enhancing Parent Child Relationships

At the beginning of this book we looked at the intimacy of the relationship formed when a grandparent sits a child on his or her lap and reads a story, or when a parent sits by a child's bedside at night to tell a tale that may precede a restful slumber. In such situations, there is a special bonding, closeness, and intimacy that exist between teller and listener. When my grandson was younger and I picked him up for our special times together, the words were spilling out of his mouth almost...

Drama As A Source Of Healing Stories

What young child does not like to play dress-up or put on a play for parents or visitors To have children act out a story from either a book they have read, a story that has been read to them, or a story they create around a particular topic helps those children identify with the character, discover the means to resolution, and attain the outcome. If you are communicating through stories in a group or classroom setting, there is a good opportunity to develop various characters and perhaps even...

Religious And Spiritual Stories

Religions have long taught through parables. In the spiritual literature are many stories of strong moral values, positive reframing, constructive management of relationships, and healthy worldviews. Here is just a small sample. Berg, L. (1999). The God stories A celebration of legends. London Frances Lincoln. de Mello, A. (1988). The song of the bird. Anand, India Gujarat Sahitya Prakash. Feldman, C., & Kornfield, J. (1991). Stories of the spirit, stories of the heart Parables of the...

Being selfaccepting

Gemma was a giraffe who felt awkward about being a giraffe. She looked at other animals and thought how she would like to be more like them. When she saw the zebras running at a gallop she wanted to run in a smooth, fluid motion like they did rather than in her own ungainly gait. When she saw the elephant, she wished she had a trunk with which she could vacuum up water and then spray it playfully over her own back or over her friends. When she saw the gazelle, she wished that she were as sleek...

Contentment

Contentment was a word that Fred Mouse may have heard, but he hadn't really thought about it before. It sounded like a big adult word. However, when he did hear it, Fred wondered what it meant. He first began to think about it while eating his toasted cheese sandwich for breakfast in his hole in the wall in the corner of the house. Maybe contentment, he thought, is that feeling in the morning when your tummy is rumbling for food and you give it a hot toasted sandwich with runny cheese in the...

Managing Emotions

P ositive emotions have an undoing effect on negative emotions, asserts Fredrickson (2000), adding that desired feelings such as joy, interest, and contentment broaden a person's thought-action repertoire, in turn building enduring resources for survival and well-being. This is much the same principal as Joseph Wolpe established with reciprocal inhibition and systematic desensitization You overcome the undesired emotion by creating the desired one. For parents, teachers, and child...

Stop Look And Listen

It is a useful skill for a therapist to be a little dissociative, by which I mean the ability for one part of you to be engaged fully in the storytelling process with the child, and another part to be standing back a little, observing the child's responses and adapting your tale to their needs. As you tell the tale, you may want to look for, and listen to, the individual reactions that communicate whether your tale is having an impact or missing the mark. Is the child sitting still, looking at...

Teaching Parents to Use Healing Stories

The emphasis of this book so far has been on professional caregivers telling therapeutic tales either to or in collaboration with children. However, parents, grandparents, and significant others in the life of the child may have greater contact and intimacy with the child than a therapist who is only available for a once-a-week consultation. If we can teach parents (the term I will use to include all close persons involved in the child's day-to-day life) to relate healing stories as they share...

Multicultural Myths Folktales Legends And Fairy Stories

Folktales contain the whole history and tradition of communicating through stories, whether to inform, teach, or entertain. In them are stories that are universal, transcending cultures, religions, and the generations. There is no more delightful method to appreciate the nature of stories than to read these tales or even better, to sit with traditional storytellers with an eye or ear open for possible therapeutic themes. Akello, G. (1981). Iteso thought patterns in tales. Dar Es Salaam,...

Humor As Metaphor

What are the jokes the children you know are telling What humorous books are they reading What comedy shows do they watch on television What commercials do they see as funny Using humor, jokes, and funny stories can quickly engage children and teenagers, communicating a powerful therapeutic message in a seemingly light-hearted manner. This is because, as Yapko says, Humor involves reframing as the vehicle for the joke. The punch line inevitably causes us to look at the incidents in the story...

Storytelling Metaphors And Therapy For Children

Metaphors are easily, and appropriately, incorporated into therapy for children. While this list is far from comprehensive, it is a starting point to give you an idea of the sort of literature available and the places you can begin to look for further resource material. It covers the art of storytelling, metaphors specifically written for children, and various approaches to child adolescent therapy. (1994a). Brave. Austin, TX Raintree Steck-Vaughn. Amos, J. (1994b). Confident. Austin, TX...

References And Professional Literature On Metaphors

In the professional literature there are many books and journal articles about metaphors that provide research into metaphor processing, offer case histories, and give examples and sources of metaphors. Throughout the text of this book, I have minimized the amount of referencing and reiteration of other people's research so as to give maximum space to the stories and the techniques for using them. To help you further explore the science, theory, styles, and applications of healing stories, I...

Ten Guidelines For Effective Storytelling

We are all telling stories all of the time. Not only do we constantly tell stories, but we also constantly ask for stories . . . thus inviting others to be storytellers, too. We ask our partners when they arrive home, How was your day We ask a colleague at work, What did you do on the weekend We ask a child arriving home from school, What did you learn today In these ways we are seeking stories and expecting the other person to tell us a tale from their experience. Through such stories we share...

How Stories Teach Values

Recently I led a group of colleagues on a workshop study tour ofBhutan, a high and tiny Himalayan kingdom north of Bangladesh and south of Tibet. While there, I was interested to discover that this is a country with an unofficial national story. The Four Faithful Friends is the country's most loved story, told to the young and repeated among the mature. It hangs as a painting in many homes and is depicted on the walls of temples, public buildings, medical clinics, and even banks. It was a mural...

Info

This one is dedicated to kids, kids of all ages, all cultures, all religions, everywhere, especially to Tom and Ella, and one who is yet to be. Acknowledgments, xv Introduction, xvii What This Book Offers, xvii A Word or Two about Words, xix Oral versus Written Stories, xix The Structure of This Book, xx Story 1 A Story of the Story, xxiii PART I EFFECTIVE STORYTELLING FOR KIDS AND TEENS, 1 Chapter 1 The Magic of Metaphor, 3 Why Tell Healing and Teaching Stories to Kids and Teens , 3 A Brief...

Oral Versus Written Stories

While I have long been told stories by my parents and in turn told them to my children, grandchildren, and clients, both young and old, I have found that storytelling and story writing are two different processes. In fact, it feels strange to be communicating with you about storytelling in a written format. Once stories are written, in black and white, they tend to take on an immutable quality as though that is the way they always have been and always should be told. The reality is that stories...

Stories for adults

Burns is indeed a master in the art of using stories for healing purposes. Metapsychology Review, January 2003 This is George Burn's best book yet. He leverages years of professional therapist experience to help individuals uncover insightful and practical solutions to the everyday life challenges encountered in the real world. The stories and metaphors hit the mark again and again. Dr. Brian Alman, Author of Self-Hypnosis, Six Steps to Freedom and Thin Meditations 101 Healing Stories...