The First Days

Start a Humility Crusade in your home by encouraging all family members to look more for the good in others and less in themselves. Follow these steps:

1. Pick your favorite skill, hobby, or focus of interest, from Barbies to the Middle East conflict.

2. Find two or three experts who know a whole lot more than you do, and read up on everything they've said on the subject.

3. Have a family discussion on several of these topics that highlights modesty, focusing on other people's thinking, and serious learning.

Another aspect of the crusade could have these steps:

1. Focus on the specific content of an arrogant remark, like a claim to know more, or do better, or be superior in some way.

2. Dig down and find out the real feelings underneath. Does your child really feel that this is true, or is he only pretending?

3. If he thinks it's true, point out the reality of the situation: that he is not the best, doesn't have the most, and so on, and show him that it doesn't matter.You love him anyway.

4. If it isn't true, show empathy for his insecurity and need to compensate.Again, show him that you love him no matter what and find out what you can do to help him overcome the fear and anxiety that actually provokes this arrogance.

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