Diagnosis

Answer these questions.

Why. The first most important question is to figure out why your kid has this fresh attitude. Have you been disrespectful to him? Has he seen you being disrespectful to your partner or other members of your family or friends? Here are some other things to consider: Has he been hanging out with a new crowd? Is he watching or listening to crude entertainment? Has he changed his appearance in trying to find a new image? What has your kid learned from being so fresh? Has it actually been effective? Is there a problem at home? A rift in your relationship? Does he resent you for some reason? Is there something about you or anything else going on right now that might be making him really mad? Does he hang around with friends who are disrespectful to their parents? What is your best guess as to why your kid is using this attitude?

What. Are there particular issues or things he is more sassy about? Are they about needing more privileges, wanting control or independence, needing attention, seeking revenge, or something else?

Who. Does she display the same fresh attitude to everyone? Does she talk differently when her friends are around? Are there some individuals she does not use her sassy tone and fresh ways on? If so, who? Why do you think this is the case? Is there anything different about their relationship with your kid? What about their response to her sassiness?

When. Is there a particular time of day, week, or month when he is fresher? Is there a reason? For instance, might he be needing control, or is he more stressed or overwhelmed than in the past? Did he just go to a concert, dance, or other influential event? Has he been sitting at home all day watching Jerry Springer? Also, when did you notice he first started being fresh and sassy? Can you think back as to what was going on in his world (family, school, friends) that might have triggered this attitude? Did he start hanging around with a new group of friends? Has he changed schools recently?

Where. Are there certain places he is more likely to be fresh (at school or day care, home, during dinner hour, in the car, with a particular kid or group of kids)? Does he use the attitude everywhere or mostly in certain places? If so, why?

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