Here are a few questions to help you pinpoint exactly what troubles you most about your kid's ungrateful attitude so you can develop the most effective makeover to change it. Check the following items if they describe your child:
□ Unappreciative or ungrateful when someone extends a thoughtful gesture toward him
□ Oblivious to the luxury and privileges of his life
□ Envious or jealous of other people's attributes or possessions
□ Needs reminders to say "thank you" to others
□ Takes for granted his safety, comfort, and good health
□ Unsatisfied with the blessings that he has and always seems to want more
□ Unwilling to reciprocate with gifts or kind acts to others
□ Feels entitled to continuing privileges, luxuries, and other resources
What concerns you most about your child's lack of gratitude? Is there one thing that you might do to tame your kid's ungrateful ways? Answering these next questions will help you understand why she is resorting to this attitude.
Why. Why does your kid have this attitude? Is it just because she's spoiled? Has she been taught to value only material things? What does she gain from being ungrateful? Remember, you use an attitude because it works. Why is she continuing to use it?
What. Are there particular issues or things over which she is especially ungrateful? Are they about wanting stuff, having things to keep up with friends, using it to make the giver feel uncomfortable, being jealous of a sibling, or something else?
Who. Does she display the same ungrateful attitude to everyone? Are there some individuals she does not use her ungrateful ways on? If so, who? Why not?
When. Is there a particular time of day, week, season, or year when your kid is more ungrateful? Is there a reason? What about times when she receives gifts from others? Does she appear appreciative of what she receives?
Where. Are there certain places he is more likely to be ungrateful (at school, home, birthday parties, holidays, with friends, at a relative's home)? Why?
Now take a look at your answers. Are you seeing any predictable patterns? Do you have any better understanding of your kid's ungrateful attitude and where it's coming from? What factors might be contributing to your kid's attitude of ingratitude?
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Although nobody gets a parenting manual or bible in the delivery room, it is our duty as parents to try to make our kids as well rounded, happy and confident as possible. It is a lot easier to bring up great kids than it is to try and fix problems caused by bad parenting, when our kids have become adults. Our children are all individuals - they are not our property but people in their own right.