Answer these questions to reflect on how your kid developed her narrow-minded biased ways in the first place, as well as why she is continuing to use them.
Why. Your first step is to try to determine why your kid is so narrow-minded and biased and what he is gaining from using this attitude. Here are a few reasons kids are prejudiced. Check ones that may apply to your kid:
□ Lacks empathy for those who are different
□ Is anxious toward a certain group due to a previous negative experience
□ Is around others who make frequent comments or jokes putting another group down
□ Is part of a peer culture that seems to focus on the negative traits of others or considers active conflict with another group to be an essential part of their identity
□ Is seeking attention or approval from others who think his biased comments are cute, clever, or funny
□ Has been allowed to be biased; no one counters his views
□ Lives in a family where only one point of view is tolerated
□ Is self-centered: has been made to believe his views are always correct
□ Has been raised in an authoritarian home where dialogue and debate are not encouraged
□ Is underexposed to diversity: raised in a homogeneous environment
□ Lacks knowledge: his views are biased due to limited information
What. Are there particular issues or things he is usually more biased about: certain races, cultures, nationalities, religions, gender, age, sexual orientation, appearance, abilities, or disabilities? How does he display his bias? Does he show disrespect toward people because of their differences? Does she make comments that put another person down, focus only on the negative traits of a particular group, tell derogatory jokes about another group, or refuse to listen to any other point of view but her own?
Who. Does he display the same biased attitude to everyone? Why? Are there a few individuals who help fuel his biased beliefs? Who are they? A cousin? Neighbor? Sibling? Peer? What about an adult? A coach? Teacher? Your friends? Are there some individuals he does not use his narrow-minded ways on? If so, who? Why does he spare them?
When. Is there a particular time of day, week, or month that might be inspired by a TV show, a racist uncle's visit, or a particular holiday (like Martin Luther King Jr.'s birthday) that provokes your kid's narrow-minded attitude? Is there a reason? For instance, he might be seeking attention or peer approval, or he might be in the company of peers, relatives, or friends who are also biased.
Where. Are there certain places where he is more likely to voice his biased views (at school or day care, home, the soccer field, one of your friend's homes,Aunt Em's)? Why?
Finally, think seriously about your answers.Are you seeing any predictable patterns? Do you have any better understanding of your kid's narrow-minded attitude and how it got started?
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